I walked into my first-grade classroom, sat in my assigned seat and began the warm-up that Monday morning. At the beginning of each week, my teacher, Mrs. Watson, would give us a worksheet, asking us to draw an illustration and write a few sentences about something happening in our lives.
I remember walking in that day feeling more down than I had ever felt before, and as I began to think of what to draw and write about for that day, all I could think of was my parents.
I picked up my blue colored pencil and began drawing a sad face because that’s what I felt. I felt empty.
I never would have imagined that a little under a year later I would be watching my mom walk down the aisle to marry my stepfather, and six months after that I would be walking down the aisle, as a flower girl, at my dad and stepmother’s wedding.
Having divorced parents is like moving from America to Europe, every other day. Each day you must adjust to a new lifestyle and culture, just like switching houses. However, with having divorced parents you don’t get time to “catch up” or adjust to the new lifestyle. Instead, everyone expects you to immediately have everything switched and figured out when you get to the other house.
Currently, I go to my mom’s house on Sundays, Tuesdays, Wednesdays and every other Saturday. I go to my dad’s house on Mondays, Thursdays, Fridays, and every other Saturday. Switching almost every day can be stressful. When you’re switching houses, you’re not just thinking about what you might need for that day, but what you might need for the next day, maybe even two.
However, when anyone asks if I would want things to be “normal” or change anything, my answer will always be no. Even though my family life can still be difficult, it is a part of my story, and I have learned so many things about who I am and my life through having divorced parents.
I know that my situation doesn’t define who I am. You may be in a temporary, hard situation, but that doesn’t change you’re identity or what you can accomplish.
Focus on the good. It’s so hard to find the silver lining of a situation or not focus on the negative things. However, even in the midst of having divorced parents, you can always be grateful for something.
