Coming home Sunday night, overworked, stressed, my body worn down, with major grades due the next morning. I don’t know if I will continue doing so much with such little rest, even though I’m the one willingly choosing to do all of it. Where will I find some calm?
All summer long, I spent my time working at a Christian summer camp and growing incredibly close to the Lord. Through His guidance and support, I knew I could produce great things. After the summer ended, I felt my junior year promoted an opportunity for me to excel with a purpose of being great. I dedicated myself to being the best student and improving my grades to keep a 3.8+ GPA. I dedicated that I would be a better boyfriend to my girlfriend of two years to make sure we stayed secure and supportive of each other through everything. I am dedicated to being the best athlete I can be with high school football and soccer, alongside club soccer, because I know that it’s my second-to-last year to prove I can compete at the next level. But with this came a lot and a lot of stress.
Every week started a new chapter for my mind, wanting the best version of myself, in every way possible. Mondays begin the week as most Mondays do, horrible. But leaving the house during the morning, I always make sure when I leave my house to pray for the Lord’s protection, knowing God has my back.
Walking into school and having some kind of test in Algebra that I know I’m going to fail after not getting time to study the previous nights always keeps me anxious. The only thing keeping me within that classroom and not staying home is the opportunity of seeing my girlfriend during the passing period, right after, to hear any new stories she wants to talk about. Walking into the next period, AP Environment Science, creates a bit of worry for me. The class itself, really calm, but there’s SO MUCH work. I stayed up until 3 a.m. recently just to complete an informational folder that’s due the next morning.
After this class, I go into advisory, the only place I can just have fun. Most days I go to my soccer coach’s room, where I’ve got the opportunity to play wall ball with my varsity teammates. Continuing with the day leads into football practice, which includes weight room, maxing out new workouts and immediately after going straight into practice with the dreaded Texas heat. Being a kicker brings its ups and downs, and practices become highly tedious, but I know I need to work to perform to my full ability on game day. After practice, I go to lunch and then history, probably the calmest part of my day. Usually, there’s no real work that needs to be done during history, so I’ll go down to soccer and practice with my guys until the school day ends.
Once school ends, another football practice until 5 p.m. Although there’s not too much to do, I am still training my best to make sure that when the time comes, I will perform. Once practice ends, I take off my sweaty pads, I rush home to get a bite to eat, and say hi to my mom before leaving at 5:30 p.m. for club soccer practice that starts at 6 p.m. For a bit of context, my club was promoted into TX2, which is the third-highest level any competitive club soccer player can play at for my age group, which leads to competitive training with a purpose. Luckily for me these practices go well and the coaches respect who I am since I’m a starting 11 player. Practice runs until 7:40 p.m. most nights, and stepping into my truck with fragile legs by now, I want to do nothing but sleep. The days are not over yet. I drive home ready for some homemade food from my loving family. I’m forever grateful I can come home to a full family every night with my mom, dad, brother and two sweet kitties. After eating dinner and getting a shower, I wish my parents goodnight and head to my room. I get into bed, call my loving girlfriend and believe the day’s over. Wait. I have an assignment due that needs to be completed before the morning. That’s usually how nights go for me, I’ll never be on top of my assignments but you know what? We ball.
That’s only Monday done.
Now getting back into bed for the last time, my body hurts so much, my mind mentally drained, can I continue this? The answer’s simple, I need to. I know that what I do creates a lot of stress and exhaustion for me, but it’s worth it for me. I’m so grateful I get the opportunity to do all of it. The Lord has blessed me. I do it not only for myself, but for the Lord, my family, my girlfriend and all my friends who support me through all highs and lows. All of it’s worth it for me, I just needed the right motivators.
